No Hoff puns here

Let's get something straight right away; the whole 'The Hoff' fad from a couple of years ago was an absolute abomination of the worst studenty kind. Horrible eyebrow permanently raised hateful tosh.

However, despite that, it's hard not to laugh at the idea that his kids are trying to launch pop careers, with the help of daddy, of course, who was famously big in Germany.

The 56-year-old has unleashed the hound of hell that is Miley Cyrus influenced teen pop, booked some studio time and hired songwriters to get their warblings out there, no doubt to a horrified public.

Meanwhile student throwback testicle Scott Mills has made a programme called The Hoff: When Scott Came To Stay for Living TV. Aaaaaaaaah kill kill kill.

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